[ It scares Gansey, too. Of course, that's not something he can just admit out loud. That would be a terrible kind of weakness, and he cannot be that. He cannot be controlled by his fear. He has to rise above it, has to be better than it.
He's the one who ought to comfort her. Not the other way around. Reacting to that thought, his arms tighten around her, keeping her close. One of his hands shifts up and moves against her back. ]
I don't want to know my future. I told you that from the very beginning. I want to make my own fate, and I want you to make yours.
I don't want to stay away from you just because a prophecy says I should. You would never hurt me. And I don't want to lose this.
[ Her true love will die if she kisses him. Her true love. Gansey wishes he could just dismiss that thought. He knows plenty of others his age would. True love? It's like something from a fairytale, and no one believes in fairytales.
But Gansey does. It's exactly the kind of romantic magic that he's always wanted to believe in. He can't disbelieve in this just because it's not favorable to him.
Besides which, it would mean that she loved him. And that, in all honesty, is far from an unpleasant thought. ]
It's the only thing that keeps her from letting the words tumble from her mouth anymore. That and her own selfish cowardice. She can't tell him that he's going to die this year, she's seen it, the signs are there in many ways. She hates that they are. ]
I don't want to hurt you. I'd do anything not to. [ It's how they all are. The knights in his quest for a king but in reality, Gansey was already their king. And they were all loyal to him.]
So what do we do? [ It's unfair, she knows, to make Gansey be the leader once again. But this is his life, his fate. Not hers. He should be the one who decides what happens, what he wants.
[ Gansey says it with half a smile, as though it’s easy. It’s not, of course, and Blue will know that better than anyone. She’s not the only one who struggles against that impulse when they’re together.
He leans his chin down against her shoulder. ]
We keep going, and we’re careful. But I wouldn’t hate it, if from time to time, we could do this. And be alone, and be together, even if we can’t kiss. I meant it, Jane. It’s not all there is.
[ He has a plan and there's comfort in that. There's hope in what he says, in the confidence in which he says it. Like it's easy. And she can pretend that maybe he thinks it is.
She lets out a soft sigh, letting him hold her, letting his words sink in and soothe her.] I want that too. [ They can't kiss. They have to be careful. There's more than just kissing.
Her hands smooth up his back on their own accord, curling against the fabric covering his shoulder blades.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
He's the one who ought to comfort her. Not the other way around. Reacting to that thought, his arms tighten around her, keeping her close. One of his hands shifts up and moves against her back. ]
I don't want to know my future. I told you that from the very beginning. I want to make my own fate, and I want you to make yours.
I don't want to stay away from you just because a prophecy says I should. You would never hurt me. And I don't want to lose this.
[ Her true love will die if she kisses him. Her true love. Gansey wishes he could just dismiss that thought. He knows plenty of others his age would. True love? It's like something from a fairytale, and no one believes in fairytales.
But Gansey does. It's exactly the kind of romantic magic that he's always wanted to believe in. He can't disbelieve in this just because it's not favorable to him.
Besides which, it would mean that she loved him. And that, in all honesty, is far from an unpleasant thought. ]
no subject
It's the only thing that keeps her from letting the words tumble from her mouth anymore. That and her own selfish cowardice. She can't tell him that he's going to die this year, she's seen it, the signs are there in many ways. She hates that they are. ]
I don't want to hurt you. I'd do anything not to. [ It's how they all are. The knights in his quest for a king but in reality, Gansey was already their king. And they were all loyal to him.]
So what do we do? [ It's unfair, she knows, to make Gansey be the leader once again. But this is his life, his fate. Not hers. He should be the one who decides what happens, what he wants.
no subject
[ Gansey says it with half a smile, as though it’s easy. It’s not, of course, and Blue will know that better than anyone. She’s not the only one who struggles against that impulse when they’re together.
He leans his chin down against her shoulder. ]
We keep going, and we’re careful. But I wouldn’t hate it, if from time to time, we could do this. And be alone, and be together, even if we can’t kiss. I meant it, Jane. It’s not all there is.
no subject
She lets out a soft sigh, letting him hold her, letting his words sink in and soothe her.] I want that too. [ They can't kiss. They have to be careful. There's more than just kissing.
Her hands smooth up his back on their own accord, curling against the fabric covering his shoulder blades.]